February 10, 2010
I received an email (you
can reach me at: mail@mysimplecommunity.com)
today from someone who regularly reads the blog. I thought it was very powerful
and raises some great points. I wanted
to pass it along and I hope others have thoughts to share in response (either
in “make a comment” or by email). By the
way, I will post all the comments that have stories or spark discussion as
COMMENTS like this one under the “Stories” tag.
Thanks for taking the time to send this.
– Rich
+++
“Rich,
I just read all your Simple Community site comments about the Super Bowl parties.
Well, I actually AVOID going to things like that because often times community
for me with a bunch of semi-strangers is work. Maybe it's easy for you, but
frankly, I would rather just be with my wife, two kids who came over and a
fridge full of goodies. Now if that makes me weird, so be it. But you may be
surprised that there are many, many people just like me. They want real,
genuine relationships, not idle chatter at a Super Bowl party. That's the
biggest problem church social activities have. Are they real? Do they really
mean anything?
“When
I read how you and Vicki stroll through your neighborhood and have
"wonderful" conversations with your neighbors, it's not me. Sure
others do it, but it's not me. So in order for me to want community, I have to WANT
community.
“Let
me say it another way. Community for the sake of community does nothing for me.
I need people who care, not those who are just socially polite. I need friends
who will stand behind me not people who could care less about me. Community can
lead to that, sure, but it's often out of my comfort zone. This group talks
together. That group talks together. And I am not in any of those groups, so it
takes effort.
“However,
what if I just don't want to? What if I'm really very happy just as I am? I am
saying all this, not to discourage you, but rather to have you figure out how
to get around my "objections". You have a tiger by the tail, but not
everyone wants to follow.”